Unconscious Sign of Weakness

Two days ago, I had a sweet dream. This was also my second dream where I realised it was a dream and decided to let it play on. I wasn’t in control of my actions, like what some people claim to do. I was just aware that it wasn’t real.

In my dream, I bought a lottery scratch ticket. For some reason, I knew I was going to win. I didn’t know how much. I just knew it. So I scratched off the coating and matched my numbers with the winning numbers (I know lottery scratch tickets don’t work this way, but it’s a dream). Lo and behold, I won $80 million. I felt extremely happy as one normally would. My problems instantly disappeared.

Then I woke up.

I felt excruciatingly annoyed not because it was a dream but because I felt happy. Now you must be thinking, “You’re annoyed because you’re happy? You must be insane.” Yeah, you might be right.

I didn’t like the dream because my mind unconsciously wanted an easy way out. It wanted something to stop the pain with minimal effort. How can I grow as a person if I do not face trials?

My mind failed me. I felt disgusted at myself. I always thought that I knew myself. I was wrong. Apparently, I want an easy way out.

Pathetic.

I will erase this weakness from inside me and beat it out with hard work and effort.

I cannot believe such weakness festers within me.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s