Blue Sky and White Clouds Mused Me

This is my last term DLSU. Yes, I am opening this blog entry with the idea of leaving. For the past months, that seems to be theme I’ve been living in. Goodbye academic world and hello working world! Please take it easy on this unemployed fresh grad with zero professional work experience. Wouldn’t that be Utopian?

Thesis and internship invaded so much of my personal life that I haven’t been able to finish three books since the start of the year. My mother’s finished four books in a month! I drowned in a sea of envy during my “thesis writing sessions” when I saw her reading on the couch whilst drinking tea. Since thesis is done, I get to read my book during breaks at the office.

Interning is giving me some rather interesting things to think about. A few days after I started, I rode a jeepney to said company, and the driver was this really jolly guy. He had friends everywhere along the route he drove. His smile revealed rotting teeth but he wasn’t afraid to show his happiness he created along that route of his. It hit me that this guy, someone who’s probably never gone through college, high school or even elementary, is happier than I am. I pretty much have everything I could ever need–opportunities for a better future. Yet this guy has found the happiness that I’ve been trying so hard to find. Sure enough, he’d be happy if he had a better paying job. But I think he’d miss the people.

Anyway, I have 3 weeks, 3 day, and 5 hours left in my internship. I hope something interesting happens.

Rediscovering Self-Love: The Girl

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I got my grade from my professor, and I’m fairly happy with it! If only I submitted my final paper on time, I would’ve probably gotten a 3.5. Well, I can’t really bend my grades in my department nor would I want to. Anyway, this means that I can go ahead and write with a clear and relaxed mind! Unless I fail in German4, that would just be crap.

SO! Let me tell you about this girl that I insanely like and have lost attraction towards after one evening. She’s the type that people would ignore at first sight. Were you thinking of love at first sight? She’s pretty much invisible, until you let her speak or until she wants to speak. She’s extremely intelligent, probably the most intelligent out of our entire European Studies batch. I’ve known her for a year, but I’ve only gotten to talk to her this year.

I told my friend, let’s call her Tänzerin, about this newfound attraction of mine. Tänzerin knows my type of girls that I’m attracted to: very Asian looking, extremely pretty, extremely white–basically Japanese, Korean or Chinese girls who are overly attractive. This girl whom I am insanely attracted to, let’s call her Dil Pickles (Rugrats, for those who don’t know,) is the total opposite of my usual Asian-white-girl attraction. Continue reading “Rediscovering Self-Love: The Girl”

Problem am Telefon

Ich hatte eine Aufnahme gemacht. Es ist ein Dialog. Es ist für meinen Deutschkurs. (I had made a recording. It is a dialogue. It is for my German course.)

I’m the guy in the recording.

I Was Doing Well Until You Came Along

Remember the girl I had a dream about, the one with the cherry blossoms and stuff? I kinda have this problem with her. Ever since that dream, my mind has been filling up with her likeness, and I honestly can’t stop thinking about her. For a while it seemed that I finally found THE person. I was a bit happy whenever I thought about it. Then, it just got out of hand.

It (not she, because she didn’t directly cause this) was beginning to negatively affect my performance at uni. I had a long ass time to think on how I was going to deal with this. It was difficult since she doesn’t know how I think about her, nor does she know that she’s causing all these internal aggravations. One night, I texted this to her (parentheses notes are not included in the text):

I need you to stay away from me for a while. I’ve started doing this (the staying away part) all ready. You’re literally on my mind 24/7, and I seriously cannot handle it. It’s all ready beginning to negatively affect me in my academics and my workload in the BSG (batch student government) doesn’t help either. It obviously isn’t your fault since you did nothing, ‘though that is the pleasant irony of it all. I’m not sure if I do want to tell you the specific reason as to why I’m doing this. If you really wanna know, I can give you two options: a) buy load (since she never has any credits in her phone) and ask me, “Why?” In which I would gladly reply, or b) ask (insert name here), he probably still remembers what I told him. Continue reading “I Was Doing Well Until You Came Along”

God is not a Good Excuse


I’m a Buddhist, and many people know this. Even my father knows this. He seems to have a habit of making arguments that just sound really stupid. I’ll talk about that soon, and I promise to keep this post on topic as much as I possibly can, since I have a tendency to deviate.

A few days ago, I had a talk with my tall-hairy-Italian friend (you know who you are) about my father. And I shall now tell you what I told my friend. As I said from the start, I am a Buddhist, and I have a very open mind to many things (as should everybody else). I have no qualms about any religion. Although, when the people who practice it step over the line, well…

I’m not sure if I wrote this in my blog; my father is now a Born Again Christian. He told me this when I had to pay my respects to a relative who passed away this year. So, anyway. For some reason, he is now much more eager to convert me back to Christianity. Oh, the things we discussed that day. He was so silly and fallacious, quite funny even when you dissect the structures of his arguments. Oops, off topic again. Continue reading “God is not a Good Excuse”